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October 25, 2005
Only 61 shopping days till .... aargh!
I'm the first to complain about the extortionate cost of Christmas and yet I'm always the one who thinks I haven't spent quite enough on X or that Y has more than Z so I must get Z something else. I seem to spend the whole year paying for the previous Christmas only to find I'm suddenly facing it all again. It's a chore ... and an expensive one at that.
As we're all going to be eating together again this year (there'll be twelve of us), my sister came up with the suggestion that we all put a rein on our spending and limit presents to a value of £10. Sounds great to me, sounds great to everyone in fact.
But it takes some doing. It's far harder to buy a meaningful present for less than a tenner than it is to splash out £30 or more. My mum is an excellent present buyer. She's already shown me a few of the items she's bought this year and they are wonderful gifts that I know will be really appreciated. I'm rather jealous, I know I won't do as well.
I normally do all my present buying the day before Christmas Eve and most people know exactly what they're going to get. I'm so predictably safe. It always seems ridiculous to me that Christmas shopping starts earlier and earlier every year.
Given that I work in the city centre, gift shopping should be easy but I never seem to find the time. And I always leave it to late to buy online. This year I'm going to have to make a special effort. I only hope I can get it right.
Posted by lilliebet at 08:42 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 22, 2005
Another failure to communicate
My mum's just phoned me.
"I thought you might like to know there's a programme just starting on Radio 4 about the subculture of Northern Seoul"
"Eh?"
"Well you used to be into it didn't you?"
"Eh?"
"Oh you did, you used to be very interested in Northern Seoul"
"When? When have I ever expressed an interest in Korea, apart from watching MASH?"
"Fool! Northern Soul, not Northern Seoul!"
*Click*
Posted by lilliebet at 11:34 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 21, 2005
Kill or Cure
Mommie's little soldier has been suffering a nasty sore throat this week (his tonsils look like haemorrhoids) but, first week in new job and all that, he's been battling gamely on determined not to give in.
"The boss, John, told me there's a spray you can get from the chemist that's good for sore throats" he tells me
"Oh OK, what's it called?"
"Not sure.... hydrochloric or something..... will that work?"
" Um, yes mate, that'll cure your sore throat alright" :O
Posted by lilliebet at 01:41 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Nine Flames
One lights my path when darkness descends
Two is the beacon that protects and defends
Three gives me warmth when the world is bleak
Four cheers my spirits when my heart is weak
Five is the goodness that shines from within
Six is the flicker of fun that is him
Seven is the spark that guides and inspires
Eight is the flame of my deepest desires
Nine is the heat of my love that won’t end
Nine Flames that are you, my love, my friend
Posted by lilliebet at 09:37 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
Extreme Sports
You can keep your base jumping and your rock diving. For me, jumping to conclusions is the most dangerous pastime.
I do it, I do it a lot actually I confess. People who know me would be surprised to hear me say this though - nine times out of ten I don't speak up, don't go off the deep-end and that's because I know that, nine times out of ten, I'm going to be wrong. And I almost always am. So I've learned to be very careful and keep schtum until I'm satisfied I was right (or, more often, wrong.)
We all do it. Very often it's down to our own stereotyping and prejudices. You expect someone to behave in a certain way, you're absolutely convinced you know how they're going to act because you know them or you know their type. So, when you walk in a room and the subject of your prejudice suddenly walks out of the opposite door, you immediately conclude they're in a huff and they're avoiding you.
Strangely, the intuition that brought you to this conclusion doesn't pick up on the phone ringing in the other room or the pan burning on the stove. So, next time you make a judgement about someone's behaviour, stop and think, just for a second. You might be pleasantly surprised.
Posted by lilliebet at 09:10 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
That was the week that was
The whole family were supposed to be having Christmas dinner together at a pub up the road so on...
Sunday
...we decided to go and pay the deposit and have our lunch while we were at it. The first awfulness of the day came when we were told the chef had been sacked. "Oh don't worry" they told us, "we have a new chef". Chef wasn't the four letter "C" word we were using by the time we'd finished our miserable cold dinner and decided we weren't parting with a penny.
I should have known it was going to happen...... for the rest of the afternoon, I suffered another session of what appears to be my family's national sport, Liz bashing. Today's subject being my son's inadequacies and my failings as a mother. I've never understood why I endure their venom. It must be some misguided sense of "family". Suffice to say, I came away from the encounter battered and bruised and somewhat inebriated. And that's when the manure really hit the ventillation. I managed to get embroiled in a row with my best friend who now won't speak to me. Can't say I blame him but I woke up ...
Monday
...heartbroken and desperate to talk to him. At the very least I wanted to apologise and explain but he didn't want to know. He did tell me to stop being a victim though. At the time I didn't recognise how valuable that advice was but later, I went down to the beach to talk to the iron men about it. They didn't impart much advice but they did listen.
While I was down there, my son rang and I asked him to come down and meet me. It was his first day on his new job, a real job this time, a trade - with a future. I stood by the pond waiting for him to arrive, being investigated by the geese that winter here. I guess they thought I hadn't been probed enough yet.
Anyway, I had a point.... oh yes. I watched my son for a long time walking across the vast expanse of grass that covers most of Crosby Marina. I could see the spring in his step; the way he held himself; and, when he got close enough, the whiteness of his smile against the filthy mess that was his face. He's taking a shot at his life, he's giving it a go. OK he falls over now and again but isn't that what I'm there for - to pick him up and get him back on his way?
With that picture in my head, I walked back home and told the guys on my site about the whole sorry mess. They were very supportive, full of good advice too. I came away from the conversation determined not to be a victim any more. It may be too late to salvage a wonderful relationships but by the time....
Tuesday
... came around, I was like a different person. My sister phoned that night to (by the way) see how my son was getting on in his new job. I left her in no doubt that he was going to make a go of it; turn himself around and achieve great things; and that I would be there to support him whatever. Even over the phone I could tell she was unsure who she was talking to, this was someone she didn't recognise. And boy did it feel good.
Wednesday and Thursday
... came and went with still no contact, no chance to make amends. I'm not really surprised, this is one time too many I've lost the plot and taken it out on the wrong person. It's a lesson that's taken me too long to learn and the only one who loses out in the end is me, so I guess it's a valuable one. But I'll get over it. For all the wailing and whinging I normally do, I always get over it in the end. No wailing and whinging this time though. Think happy thoughts!
Posted by lilliebet at 12:08 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 19, 2005
So Much to Say, So Little Time
Really, truly I've been chocker for weeks, I haven't even been able to stop by here and talk about it.
So much has happened too but look at that horrible blank space at the bottom of the page :O
Never mind I'll make amends. Tonight, yes definitely tonight....
Posted by lilliebet at 07:08 AM | Comments (0)
October 08, 2005
I've been Tagged
By Oldguy
OK I looked up my 23rd post but the problem is, I have two 23rd posts.
Before I started this blog I had been keeping a journal at CastleCops and, when I learned how, I transferred those posts into here so this is my 23rd post ever and the 5th line says simply "1837". Bill had just come back from holiday with a friend in New Zealand who had family connections to Liverpool way back in the distant past. Bill offered him my services as a researcher. It was fun but I didn't follow it through, shame on me.
My official 23rd post was about the voluntary severance being offered by my employers at the time and the 5th line was just a link to the press report in the Liverpool Echo.
So I guess 23 and 5 aren't my numbers, now if you'd have said 22 OldGuy, that would have been the one about the Ocean Pie (I still haven't forgiven you for dissing my ocean pie yet ;-) )
Unfortunately I don't have 5 friends who blog and, as OldGuy's already been tagged, I have to leave it down to three.
So Bill, Z and Gerald here are the rules
1. Go into your archive
2. Find your 23rd post.
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five other people to do the same.
Posted by lilliebet at 09:24 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
Once Bitten
The strangest thing happened to me this week. I was contacted by a woman I've never met, never had contact with before. She's the ex-wife of a friend of mine.
She sent me an email which screamed to me that she was trying to justify her position in life and the actions that she's taken. They are no matter to me. Apart from the continued effect she has on my friend, what she does and what she says is none of my business. I had to wonder why she contacted me at all.
From things that were said later, it appeared that she thought I am someone I'm not. I got the impression she thought I was my friends partner rather than his friend. It crossed my mind then that what she was trying to do was not so much a justification of herself but a condemnation of him. Why? For what purpose?
They have been apart for almost a decade. She has been remarried and her life goes on without him. So why does she still hold all this bitterness towards him?
We all get angry when relationships end, separation and divorce can lead normally sane people to behave in the most base manner. I haven't been there, haven't done it but I've seen it and it can be ugly. I try to understand.
But I will never understand holding on to the bitterness and the anger. It is it's own cancer and it will grow inside you if it's given the right conditions. You can never be happy in your own life while you are putting your time and resources into spoiling someone else's.
Let go of it, leave it be. Get on with growing your own happiness, be content in your own life.
Posted by lilliebet at 08:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 03, 2005
Batteries Not Included
Why do some people fight technological advance? My mum for example. My mum's a very intelligent woman, she has a law degree and a very responsible job (she regularly stands up before County Court Judges and argues to keep people from being evicted from their homes) but can she work a video recorder? Not on your life.
I bought her a DVD player last Christmas, and a copy of Little Britain to kick off her collection. Yesterday I took round Pirates of the Caribbean, I'd been promising to watch it with her since it was first released.
Before we watched it, we had to go through the whole "I don't know how to use the stupid thing" rigmarole for the umpteenth time.
"OK watch what I do" says I, plugging the stupid thing into the wall socket. Immediately the screen fills with an image - the opening titles to Little Britain - she actually hasn't switched the thing on again since we watched it on Christmas Day.
Once I'd explained to her that putting batteries in the remote control increased it's effectiveness tenfold, she thoroughly enjoyed the film and can't wait to get working on the list of films she's been dying to see.
"This'll be great when there's nothing to watch on telly."
"Yes, mother that's the whole point."
Oh well one step forward....
Of course she's still looking in disdain at the Freeview set and the VCR but I just don't have the energy right now.
Posted by lilliebet at 06:53 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack